Posted By • October 23rd, 2016

The next few minutes are a mystery to me. I remember being pushed and knocked about, considerable snorting behind my head and in my ears, and an over-all sensation of being caught up in an irresistible pink hurricane. Coming to, I found myself standing with my palms against the wall in one of the stalls of the bathroom, my skirt scrunched up at my waist and my panties (also pink) down around my ankles. I got my hindquarters cleaned up (and why did I use that word?) then went out the door. As I walked back to my seat, I[…] Read More

Posted By • October 5th, 2016

Sassy Pants finished her oration, then looked around the room for confirmation that her speech had had its desired effect. Indeed, I saw expressions of anger on the faces of the other patrons, they having been equally moved to righteous indignation by her words. Then, from out of the crowd there emerged a most amazing sight! It was another pink unicorn! This one was larger than Sassy Pants, and showed himself a prime example of rugged masculinity (thereby proving that it is indeed possible to be both “virile” and “pink” at the same time). His face reflected a most appealing[…] Read More

Posted By • September 22nd, 2016

I waited for Sassy Pants to return from the Ladies Room, but as the moments ticked by, I become concerned. So I got up and walked toward the restrooms in the back. But when I passed the door to the Men’s Room, I heard loud, even thunderous noises coming from inside. There was clearly a violent altercation taking place! I could feel the vibration of heavy bodies throwing themselves against the door and walls inside. There were wild cries and whinnies… as if, imaging a large and powerful racehorse being locked up in a stall, someone had thrown a cobra[…] Read More

Posted By • September 15th, 2016

This past Saturday I visited my favorite gay bar, where I went in and headed to my favorite booth in the back. Unfortunately, I saw the booth was already occupied, but despite this unforeseen setback, I had a most rewarding experience, which I will tell you about. Already ensconced in the booth was a fluorescent pink unicorn! Somewhat smaller than a proper “horse,” but larger than a mere pony, the animal was as colorful as she was exotic. (Yes, I looked around quickly and verified it was a filly.) She was, as I say, bright pink in color, and she[…] Read More

Posted By • August 23rd, 2016

If you stop to think about it, you will realize that unicorns are not often seen these days. They are rare – so rare that we will sometimes call someone a “unicorn” if that person exhibits traits which are seldom found in the general population. And being so rare, most people are completely uninformed about the genuine characteristics of unicorns. People often think they have magical properties or exhibit a higher, more-evolved consciousness. Which is a joke, really, because – as anyone who has ever met a unicorn will tell you – they (1) have a wicked sense of humor,[…] Read More

Posted By • August 14th, 2016

Although I live in Cleveland, I take a deep and personal interest in what goes on in Chicago. (Two of my children live there.) So it was shocking to me to see that over the July 4th weekend in Chicago, there were (depending on how you keep score) 82 people shot, of whom 14 died. These are distressingly large numbers, but as big as they are, they are only part of the yearly total, which (as I write) is 2,223 shot and 356 killed. The more I pondered these numbers, the more it seemed to me that we are witnessing[…] Read More

Posted By • July 26th, 2016

I am a member of the LGBT community, and considering the long, sad history of confrontations between LGBT folks and the police, I feel I must speak up. Now, seeing all that has happened recently involving police shootings, I want to make two specific proposals to reduce the carnage. (One today; the other next issue.) Why are we (and by “we” I mean black men) in so much danger today from police? Here is what I see: Young men are trained as policemen; then they are given a service weapon and sent out into the street to “enforce the law.”[…] Read More

Posted By • July 21st, 2016

Sometimes, I am proud to be a lawyer. In May, the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops revealed that during the one year period ending June 2015, the Church paid out $153,000,000 in damages to victims of clergy sex abuse. During that same year, an additional 384 new victims came forward with claims of sex abuse. But this is trivial. Between 1950 and 2015, the Church in the U.S. paid out a total of $3.5 Billion (!) in damages for clergy sex abuse. A staggering amount, and due entirely to the fact that lawyers for those victims filed lawsuits against the[…] Read More

Posted By • July 5th, 2016

The events in Orlando have caused me to adopt an unforeseen and even shocking resolution, which I will share with you in a moment. But first, let me tell you about my daughter’s pet rabbit “Sprinkles.” Now, despite what you may be imagining (picturing a multi-colored rainbow of sparkling candy bits scattered across the top of a chocolate sundae), Sprinkles, in fact, had a coat of the purest, darkest, unbroken jet black fur you will ever see. At the time, Sprinkles lived in our house with our family dog, Daisy, who – on that universally-recognized scale of “Fierce and Fearsome[…] Read More

Posted By • June 20th, 2016

Local LGBT publications across the country are full of notices and “event calendars” telling us of Pride Parades scheduled in cities near and far. But I asked myself, “Why do we march?” Here is what I decided. Now, there are many sorts of parades you will see in any year you choose. There are parades on Memorial Day, when we pause to honor and remember those men and women who sacrificed so much to keep us free. And for all the problems we LGBT folk may have in this country, it’s much, much worse elsewhere in the world. Then there[…] Read More